Marshall &Kay Family Histories
1970 - 1976
B. Vaughn Marshall
Different Tests
Sometimes the field of work and study (geology) that Vaughn had chosen would invoke a negative response from some people in our church (The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints). I was not as aware of the critical remarks he would hear, probably because I never felt there was a conflict between what the Gospel taught and what was really scientifically true. I just thought that the Lord would make it all clear someday. But Vaughn dealt with the reality of crustal formations that occurred over long periods of time (evolution) on a daily basis. He always believed that the scriptures held the truth, but he felt that there was still much to be reveled in the Lord’s due time. In the meantime he explained to our children the difference between “evolution” and “Darwin’s Theory” of evolution (which he did not accept). He didn’t say too much about the subject at church because some members really got excited about it. But he was very disturbed one time when our teenage children told him that their seminary teacher at church, taught them that the world was created in 6000 years. They said the teacher told them this was what the Prophets of the Church taught and there was no room to think anything else. The seminary teacher at that time was also the Stake President so that lent extra strength to what he said. Vaughn told me that he went to the President to talk to him about the subject. He told me that as he began to explain his position, the President became very angry and refused to continue the conversation. Later, during a Priesthood Meeting, the President, who was in our ward, brought the subject up and questioned Vaughn’s testimony and knowledge of the scriptures in front of all that were at the meeting. The situation embarrassed and hurt Vaughn a great deal. I relate this story for a special reason. These kinds of things happen to all of us. They are painful and hard to get over. I was disturbed at the way the President reacted in this situation, but he was a good person and was trying to do what he felt was right. It took me a while to come to that viewpoint however. I think it took a lot of spiritual strength for Vaughn to get beyond the feelings he had also. But he continued to support that brother as the Stake President
I’ll relate another experience here only because the lesson learned was important and may help one of our family members someday. This particular trial happened to both of us. One of our teen aged daughters was going through a difficult time. We didn’t understand why but she had become very depressed. She would do things to hurt herself and we were very afraid that she was suicidal. It happened that our new home teacher was a child psychologist. Vaughn and I were very private people and had difficulty sharing any family problems with anyone. The Bishop had been encouraging members to utilize their home teachers more when they needed help. We had been seeking help from the Lord but still did not understand what to do. So we went to our home teacher for help. What could we do? How should we do it? We felt a little desperate. He saw our daughter once and gave us a booklet about tough love, and said that was all he could do. Wasn’t there some advice? Anything? But there wasn’t. We never did understand why he couldn’t, or wouldn’t help . He never inquired how things were going or asked about our daughter. We felt hurt and uncared for. Years later we decided that perhaps he was having his own problems and wasn’t able to help. Anyway, we were left feeling there was nowhere to turn--- no one to turn to except the Lord. We prayed together and we prayed alone. We prayed a lot. Gradually, I think Heavenly Father answered each of us in our own way. The answers came slowly and to each of us the way we would understand best. The lesson we learned was that sometimes, the only place we can turn is to the Lord. There is no one and nothing else that will help—only the Lord. We have to put all our faith in Him. We learned that some answers don’t come overnight. We learned a big lesson about faith and I think that’s what Vaughn wants his children and grandchildren to know.
Accident
1973—Another eventful year. For a few years we had been camping for a week or so for our summer vacations. Very often Vaughn’s folks would camp out with us and gramps always brought ‘the boat’. All of the Murray’s (who is Vaughn’s sister Elaine, husband Tom Murray and their six children) enjoyed water skiing and often they would join us on vacation too. So it was natural for our family members to try skiing also. Vaughn became very good at it. I might add here that Vaughn was a good athlete. He had good coordination and really enjoyed most sports. (By the way, gramps was not a slouch either—at 65 he had learned to water ski). Anyway, Vaughn had been skiing on one ski going in and out of the wake pretty fast and suddenly he went down. He said it happened so quickly that he didn’t remember how or what happened. Apparently the rope must have encircled the small finger on his right hand and tore it off completely. He said he didn’t realize what had happened until he surfaced and looked at his hand. Gramps brought him right back to shore and we took him to the nearest emergency room. It was in a very small town and the only doctor on call did his best. It really should have been trimmed better---there was so little skin and no fatty material. The skin was just stretched over the exposed bone in hopes that it would heal. That type of repair can be very painful and it was. Losing a finger may not seem a terrible lose but it was quite traumatic for Vaughn. Probably because it was so uncomfortable for so long, and it seemed to affect all the muscles in his right hand. It took a long time for the whole hand to heal. Because it was his right hand it was very difficult to do all the things he always did with his right hand.
Mission – Primary – Divorces – Parents –Prudhoe - Birthday
Something very special happened that year also. Our son, was called on his mission to the Virginia, North Carolina area. It meant a great deal to Vaughn to see his son leaving for his mission. He knew that it was something our son wanted to do, not because he thought he should for us, but to please his Heavenly Father.
About 1974 I was asked to help as Primary President. Vaughn supported me fully in my calling even though I let it take a lot of time away from my family responsibilities. He could see my weakness and was very patient while I struggled with it. This calling came just at the time when Vaughn especially needed my support and help. He had been gradually slipping into a severe depression. Neither one of us knew how severe it was becoming. (I’ll return to that in a minute.) “Life” just kept happening. He was feeling more frustration at work and his trips to T-3, with the isolation, were harder to take. His mother had, had heart bypass surgery in 1973. That was when bypass surgery was still new and recovery took much longer. She began to lean heavily on Vaughn because his dad seemed to be having memory problems. (We found out later that he had Alzheimers’) This caused friction between his parents and he would find himself in the middle helping them to work things out. It was quite a stress to him.
Some shocking things happened to some of our closest acquaintances in our Ward (with the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints), a few of the most active couples, those having leadership callings, were getting divorces. It was deeply disturbing to both of us. It just seemed to happen overnight, no warning. It made us stop and take a long serious look at our marriage. We were concerned that we had been taking each other for granted and wouldn't realize it till too late. We both prayed hard that it wouldn't happen to us and our prayers were answered.
In 1975 Vaughn and Elaine (his sister) joined forces with their families to give their parents a wonderful 50th wedding anniversary. It was held in the Palo Alto, CA LDS Church building. It turned out very nice. Vaughn had taken some of their older pictures and had them blown up poster size and put them around the hall. He wrote up and presented a special program all about their lives. He made their stories so fun and interesting. That was my first exposure to his writing talent.
In January of that year - 1975 - he was given an interesting assignment at work. He had been one of those invited to attend a meeting with the working group on Offshore Permafrost Studies. The purpose at that time was to “examine the problems posed by permafrost to the development of petroleum resources on the Artic Continental Shelf.” The end of the invitation stated that “Marshall has been Lachenbruch’s colleague for the past several years and is responsible for the field aspects and logistics of permafrost research.” So he found himself on board ship again, doing offshore geothermal measurements in deep-sea drill holes at Prudhoe Bay, Alaska, all during the months of April and May of 1976. He was able to help write up reports on their findings.
1976 was the year our son returned from his mission and married his sweetheart. He had met her through the mail. She wrote him as a missionary project and they fell in love writing letters back and forth. What a thrill for Vaughn to be one of the witnesses at their sealing in the Oakland Temple.
That year the family all got together for Vaughn’s 46th birthday. Each person wrote a short note about him. The notes are fun and add another interesting view into his personality. The notes follow:
From Nana (his mom)
Vaughn’s idea for getting the ducks in a shed out of danger of a killing, hungry, prowling animal was not to wear the family out trying to guide them up into the door, but by using his imagination he snapped his fingers and skillfully spread his own wings and legs, duck like, which not only made them feel more comfortable but recognized authority.
From Gramps (his dad)
Once upon a time there was a young man who had just graduated from high school and was vacationing in Utah. While fishing he lost hid graduation present, a watch that his parents had given him. We were about half-mile down stream so we walked up the stream and found the watch. Lived happily ever after.
From Yvonne (his wife)
I think he is a very patient person --especially when I was learning how to budget money. He has wonderful leadership ability, is a loving father and the very best husband in the world. He’ll eat anything – he had to learn to do that many years ago when I was trying to learn to cook. He doesn’t even complain when there aren’t any cookies. He just goes around looking in cupboards and cookie jars and looking wishful.
From his son-23 yrs. old
1. He bought me a bike instead of a diving mask.
2. He took me fishing in Gramps’ old boat when we were camping. We didn’t get anything. The black guys in the camp next to us got a lot of catfish.
From our son's wife- 23 yrs. old
He always finds something to say to make me feel good when I’m down or upset – he’s very encouraging and loving.
From his oldest daughter-19 yrs. old
When I think of dad I think of the powerful Captain Kirk.
From his second daughter –17 yrs. old
Once upon a time there was a handsome young man whose name was Vaughn. And by some coincidence he met a lovely young lady whose name was Yvonne. Now these two decided, after careful thought and prayer, that they would get married because they loved each other.
Years went by and before they knew it, they were surrounded by kids, who off and on drove them up the wall. But there was one particular kid, we won’t mention any names, who was just too much. You never knew what this kid would do next. Sometimes ________ was pretty bright, and other times ________ was pretty dumb. At times this kid did crazy things and then again ______ did something right. But right now this kid is trying to tell her dad how much she appreciates him and the work he does. She wants to express her gratitude for teaching her how to laugh and how to love. This person doesn’t know what she would do without her wise father’s patience.
From his third daughter –11 yrs. old
He keeps everybody laughing and he helps you with your problems.
From his fourth daughter-7 yrs. old
I like it when daddy reads stories to me on Sunday. I like what he got me for Christmas.
From his fifth daughter –7 yrs. old
Daddy is funny at the dinner table. Sometimes he teases me.