Marshall &Kay Family  Histories

1980 - 1981

B. Vaughn Marshall

Life Keeps Happening 

          By this time our son and daughter-in-law had their first baby, a baby boy. After much hard work, our oldest daughter graduated with her degree in Special Education from Brigham Young University in Utah. And our second daughter (third child) had been there also and came home again to work for a while. As I mentioned earlier, life just kept happening. Then it seemed like it began to happen even faster. Our second daughter went back to Utah again, and while she was there got back together with her boyfriend and decided to be married. They wanted a Christmas wedding so she came home a few weeks early to help with the preparations. We had the wedding and reception in our home. It was packed with both families. They had decided to live in Sun Valley, Idaho. Vaughn and I found it very hard to think of her so far away; it was hard not knowing how long it would be before we saw her again.

Summary of 1981 

 That was Christmas of 1980.  In April of 1981 I was diagnosed with Multiple Sclerosis. In July of 1981 mother was diagnosed with cancer. In September of 1981 our second daughter had her first baby. In October of 1981 our oldest daughter (who graduated from BYU) was married, and mother died. In the spring of 1982 one of our daughters was struggling with a severe depression. In the summer of 1983 the doctor found a large tumor growing in her leg.  In December of 1983 Vaughn’s dad died and his mother came to live with us. Towards the end of 1984 we became foster parents to   our daughters friend. Many major things had happened in just a few years. I’ll touch a little on each of these things as they touched Vaughn’s life.

Multiple Sclerosis 

The M.S. I was diagnosed with appeared rather suddenly and progressed rapidly. Within a few days I was in the hospital and unable to walk. My symptoms were varied and quite debilitating and I was very frightened. Before I went into the emergency room and was diagnosed, I had asked Vaughn for a blessing. At that time neither of us knew what my illness was. The blessing was very profound. It was the reason that I was able to maintain good health to this point in my life. Vaughn gave me a blessing, using the power of the Priesthood, that I would completely recover from the illness I had. He said that it would take time, but that I would recover completely. I was down for three months, sometimes hardly able to respond, but I KNEW I was going to be well. For a while it was very difficult to sleep and almost nightly I would ask Vaughn for a blessing. It was the only thing that made me feel calm.  I will be forever grateful that he honored his priesthood and was willing to share its blessings with me. I know this was a hard time for him. He had to be mother and father to the kids and doctor to me and continue to fight his depression.

Cancer

Just as I was recovering, mother was diagnosed with cancer. She had surgery and radiation therapy. For about a month after the radiation it looked pretty good and then it spread so rapidly. By August we all knew her time was limited. I took another leave of absence from work to help care for her. It would have been very hard to do if Vaughn had not been willing to help also. He told me that he found himself doing things for her that he never thought he could ever do for anyone. She often told me how thoughtful he was and how grateful she was to him. He had a much more tender nature than I.  Towards the end of September our second daughter’s baby girl was born, and she asked if I could be there. The doctor was able to place mother in the hospital for the week I was there. I was not very cheerful while I was at our daughter, and that was sad for her. She had a sweet baby girl but I kept wondering how mother was.

Just about the time we learned about mother, our oldest daughter became engaged. They planned to be married just before Christmas but then moved the date up to October hoping mother would make it. She almost did.  ----

Vaughn wrote:

                   Mary Kay has passed away

                   It was not sweet,

                   There was no thrill

                   Nor was it ever pleasurable.

                   With soft warm feet

                   Regardless how she did entreat.

                   And she is dead, she could not stay

                   Her lovely skin became all yellowed

                  She aged ten years

                   each day she stayed

                   And though we prayed

                   and wiped our tears

                   prompted not by any fears

                   but only sympathy for death unhallowed.

                   Some say that on that day

                   They’ll kick and scream

                   And fiercely fight

                   So all within their sight

                   Shall change their theme

                   And hold in admirable esteem,

                   that fools.

                   The Reaper is not held at bay

                   The Reaper never comes to play

                   Today he left with Mary Kay

                   Mary Kay has passed away

                   She did not hesitate to leave

                   The choice, she made,

                   Then why the pain! 

 She passed away about a week and a half before our first daughters wedding.

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